There is no one out there who doesn't feel good about him/herself when his/her weight loss efforts are noticed. It could be when a friend, colleague or family member asks the simple question "Have you been working out?" or, when someone you haven't seen in ages exclaims "You have lost some pounds. Good job!" Yes. I'm sure a lot of you out there have heard these several times. However, are you usually prepared for those who say the demoralizing stuff? Surely, there must have been a few who found it hard to believe that you were capable of losing weight by the conventional method ie. Diet and Exercise. Oh! and then there are those who actually tell you that you would look ugly if you ever lost weight.
Now, if you do not have a strong spirit you may become an emotional wreck from hearing some of these things. I have never really cared about the stretch marks that are becoming more visible by the day or the fact that certain parts of my body may never be the same. It is my body and no one else's. I remember when I weighed 242lbs and my size 20 trousers were so tight that they were actually cutting my skin. I felt like crap but I still kept eating the wrong foods. I cried when I couldn't get clothes in my size but still ate junk food religiously. My new year resolutions to lose weight would vanish as soon as I saw some pastry or tasty drink. And let's not forget the late night eating as well as snacking. I was out of control. The sad part was that deep down I knew that I was doing the wrong thing. People kept commenting "Enyonam, you are putting on too much weight." An aunt actually asked "Do you expect to get a husband looking like that?" However, with all these comments I still didn't make any attempts to exercise because I was worried about how people would stare at me and laugh if I tried to even walk briskly in the neighborhood.
My first wake up call came in 2008 when I graduated and had to do my National Service at the Dietetic Unit of a Teaching Hospital. Looking at all the morbidly obese people who came in tears because their obesity was causing them a lot of pain was scary. The cases of diabetes, high cholesterol levels and joint issues were just overwhelming. I didn't want to get to that point. I just couldn't. So, I started taking herbal teas. I registered at a gym where the quack instructor had me doing 2000jumps with the jump-rope in my first week. That had me at the cardiologist's office by the second week since the pressure was too much on my heart and I was in pain. Wow! This is the longest post I've ever had to type. Please bear with me as I share my story.
So, I put my weight loss efforts on hold and tried to do a few things like exclude refined sugar from my diet and eat more vegetables. After my service I went to graduate school and then, I started eating more junk food at very very late hours because of the pressure of school work. I fell in love as well. The guy made me feel like a princess. I begun to feel like weight wasn't a problem. Then, he broke my heart by going after a much skinnier girl. I know that he could have liked her for so many other reasons but I managed to convince myself that it was because I was too fat. After weeks of crying and looking at my folds in the mirror I made a decision. Only I can give myself the maximum amount of love I deserve. I was going to lose weight; not for any guy but for me. I was going to lose the weight to feel good and be healthy. I was going to lose weight because.... I loved MYSELF.
That was in 2009. It was on this day three years ago that I made that decision and I've never looked back. Sure, there have been a few falls but I always get back up. Anytime I look at my before and after pictures I realize that I am on a positive and enlightening journey to my goal. I am fitter, hotter and happier. There are those who still say discouraging things but after three years in this, my spirit is tougher than a crocodile's back.
